My friends are so fucking talented

Yesterday:

Wake up at seven. Went back to bed because it was way too early. It looked nice out and I wanted to run but my body wouldn't let me move from my comfy sheets and newly washed covers. Yes I finally did laundry. Laundromats are weird. Got a call from Unni at ten asking if I could help him with his history class online. Thoroughly enjoyed talking about the New Masons and the Cold War and Marxism and segregation and the Gulf of Tonkin. Helped him write a kick ass essay. Miles came at three to help me do my laundry since I'm a n00b to laundromats. Unni leaves. I pack all my clothes in a suit case and grab my camera. On the way I see the most gorgeous woman and run across the street to take her photo. I get hit in the head with her umbrella. Do laundry. Come home. Watch Michael Jackson's This is It. Kinda sad. Get a call from Victor. He came with sheri to talk about Dust. Irwin comes over a bit later. We talk about the new issue and we're all pretty effing excited to have such great talented photographers this issue. We talk about putting up a show. We get hungry and get pizza. I made friends with the arabic guy behind the country and talked to him in more horrible choppy arabic. We leave and go to elliots. Moments later I am just completely stoned. So stoned I give my keys and phone to victor. I feel like I could make some bad decisions tonight. We cant decide on what to drink. We write a ton of alcohol on pieces of paper and put it in a hat. They pick mine. Rum. Oh jesus. 15 minutes later the alcohol is here and all I remember is looking at a book on Tim Burton and some photo book. I had to put it down I was getting self concious. We hang out and listen to amazing music. I find a tiny sketch book. I guess whenever anyone comes to their apartment you have to draw something. Anything. I flipped through and saw these amazing works from my friends who I had no idea could even draw. For the past two years I just saw them as friends who went to school with me and who I liked shooting with. I never stopped to think they'd be good at anything else as horrible as it sounds? I got extremely happy knowing I have such great and talented friends. I wish I had my camera then to take photos of some of their artwork.

I'll write more later today. Errands. Dig

Quick stop

On the agenda for today:

Wheatpaste some BBI images in the mission
Farmers Market
Embarcadero fun times
Laundry at the skeevy laundromat next door
Vegan pizza tonight?

More updates when I get a minute

A new year for new beginnings

I needed my ass to get kicked!
And what better way than for an intensive 3 day workshop of nothing but photography? BBI (black boots ink) put on an amazing workshop. I met amazing people, extremely talented photographers and made some new friends I hope that stay in touch and become closer with.

I've carried cameras with me everywhere and take shots here and there and go back to my long term projects however this weekend just kicked my ass in terms of the level of where I want to be. There is something just so pure and exciting of waking up and shooting from sunrise to sunset and working your ass off. I was extremely happy with the outcome of everything and still have to develop my tri x film to see how that came out. By the way is it odd that I've been itching to get back to school and just haul ass in the dark room? hmm

This weekend I made such amazing memories and I thought about a lot of things.

Is it too late to make a New Years resolution? I never thought of making one this year but this weekend made me realize how passionate I am about photography and just the process of getting to know the person on the other side of the lens and hearing their story. And the process of writing again. Not just jotting down information and quotes but fucking writing.

Resolution. Shoot everyday. Write everyday. And post in here again. At least every other day.



It's already 9:30 and I haven't cleaned my apartment so I think I'll get up on that. More photos/stories to come.

Link to my flickr with some photos that I took over the workshop
http://www.flickr.com/photos/panduhbearr/sets/72157623146785769/

Blessed be.

My best friend/sister


What hasn't gone on in the past few weeks?
Midterms have come and slapped me across my cute little face. I still have one more class, digital printing, to worry about. I kind of fell off the ball with that class, but after some great one on one conversations with my instructor
I'm sure I'll be doing better soon.

This past week or so I've had my eyes open to so many different situations
I know now what the real meaning of friendship is
I find it ridiculous some people can't be happy and appreciate what life brings them

One year ago today I never thought I'd be living with two other girls
In some apartment in SoMA working + school + trying to have a normal life
But I'm loving every minute of it
I couldn't ask for better two roommates
And I really enjoy their company. It took me the past two weeks to fully appreciate
How much we all get a long and respect each other.

As the semester gets closer and closer to an end I'm kind of freaking out
On what I want to do for my emphasis for the rest of my career at AAU
My heart is in documentary but half my friends cant even take the classes they want
because they are constantly being dropped since not many people sign up for the classes.
I'm not spending an extra couple grand so I can take the classes when PEOPLE decide to sign up
I want my classes to be there for sure and not get some notice a week before school starts
That my class has been dropped due to a lack of people signing up. Weak.

I think I need to keep working on some photos for my printing class.
I promise to update more

It's hard to believe

Ryan: This guy is so interesting to me. What started out as a last minute shoot for my QOL class, turned into my next project


School is so soon. I decided to take this semester but do only two classes that will def. transfer over to any other school I may go to in the future. I read that SF AI lost 25% of their instructors last semester, and apparently Academy snagged some good instructors and I'll be with Brian Hewitt I guess for digital printing. Nice.

Wondering when I will get around to all the small little tasks before school starts...

I'm missing my family a lot. Ever since I got my new job I've been working my ass off trying to make some money and hopefully pay full rent. I'd feel more content I hate having my family pay for things...

Been listening to The Zombies lately. Loving it!
I'll write more later.

I fail at life

Apologies for not updating at all. Life has been slow to say the least. And when I'm in a funk I usually don't take as many photos as I'd like to.

Updates..

Nastiia and I are roommates shes the best.
Niyaz left and moved to ohio... but came up and surprised me for the weekend

Considering either finishing school online or transferring and opening up my own gallery. It's something
I've always wanted to do so I think I'll definitely work towards that.

Will update later.

Almost done...

So much life has happened over one semester. I won't go into much detail
But it's such a trip from leaving the country and being so extremely detached from a regular society
And to be back in San Francisco.

June 5th I'll have a show for Bay Area Documentary Association at this Publishing house (if I got that right?) across from SF Chronicle. I'm extremely excited for that.

I hope I do at least decent in most my classes, I kind of fell off track mid semester taking care of my family
But everything seems to be alright now

I'm not happy with one of my final assignments. It's this one year project I've been doing in San Jose
Documenting some convalescent homes and I'm still developing film for it for thursday. I went home this weekend
And shot as much as I could but I have this underlying feeling I still don't have a fully polished finished piece..
Which makes me just agitated. There are some projects I do for myself and there are some projects that I just
Fully en-golf myself in... and I get dissapointed easily because I have such high expectations of what I want to convey....

But in 6 days I will be on a plane leaving for Hawaii
I have a few gigs lined up and hopefully by the time I get back I'll have paid off the plane ticket

Looking for a new apartment as well with nastiia today in a few hours. I still have to type up an essay so I should do that now..